Mike Huckabee's Surge and Halls of Illusion

I came across this question on the recent republicans debate on another hall of illusion, CNN - Do you believe every word of the Bible? - and this is what another Governor from Hope, Arkansas, surging in the polls, Mike Huckabee had to say:

As a Man from Hope has said, the Bible is allegorical word of God and no one, not even the pastor Huckabee, is supposed to fully understand it. Good, I always believed the faith is a private issue and that it should stay there, at your home, in your church, in your heart. While I watched those eight middle aged Christian men (with a Mormon believer in the Bible among them), I watch very wealthy white men, a real representatives of the most diversified country in the world and am wondering what is wrong with this country? Do those politicians and pundits have anything else to say but to endlessly talk about the Bible, a book none understands? And how could you "understand" it, when it is so full of factual contradictions?

Two Gospels are saying Jesus was baptized by John the Baptist, while Luke asserted that John was already in prison. Mark and John give little importance to the birth of Jesus, while Matthew and Luke give differing accounts. There are three separate and different versions of the 10 Commandments (Exodus 20, Exodus 34, and Deuteronomy 5). As for the question of God’s true nature, there are many substantive contradictions. Is God a loving or vengeful God? In some sections of the Bible, vicious acts of vengeance, including the genocidal extermination of opposing tribes and nations, appear to be blessed by God. God turns on the Egyptians and transforms the Nile into blood so the Egyptians will suffer from thirst – and then sends swarms of locusts and flies to torture them, along with hail, fire and thunder from the heavens to destroy all plants and trees. To liberate the children of Israel, God orders the firstborn of every Egyptian household killed so all will know “that the Lord makes a distinction between the Egyptians and Israel” (Exodus 11:7). The killing does not cease until “There was not a house where one was not dead” (Exodus 12:30). Amid the carnage God orders Moses to loot all the clothing, jewelry, gold and silver from the Egyptian homes (Exodus 12:35-36).

And what if Umberto Eco is right and all this Bible authoring was a practical joke? This is what he wrote in his sensational and thrilling book, "Foucault's Pendulum":

"Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John are a bunch of practical jokers who meet somewhere and decide to have a contest. They invent a character, agree on a few basic facts, and then each one’s free to take it and run with it. At the end, they’ll see who’s done the best job. The four stories are picked up by some friends who act as critics: Matthew is fairly realistic, but insists on that Messiah business too much; Mark isn’t bad, just a little sloppy; Luke is elegant, no denying that; and John takes the philosophy a little too far. Actually, though, the books have an appeal, they circulate, and when the four realize what’s happening, it’s too late. Paul has already met Jesus on the road to Damascus, Pliny begins his investigation ordered by the worried emperor, and a legion of apocryphal writers pretend also to know plenty…

It all goes to Peter’s head; he takes himself seriously. John threatens to tell the truth, the poor man is seeing things: Help, there are locusts all over my bed, make those trumpets stop, where’s all this blood coming from? The others say he’s drunk, or maybe it’s arteriosclerosis… Who knows, maybe it really happened that way?”

Blaise Pascal has warned us that "Men never do evils so completely and cheerfully as when they do it for religious conviction," so perhaps would be a good idea to tone down this endless bible talk. We do not want to sound like a bunch of crazy religious fanatics, don't we?